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Girl, I Guess:
A Progressive Voter Guide to the 2022 Democratic Primary in Cook County and Beyond
Para una versión en Español presione aquí: COMING IN JUNE!
Table of Contents/TL;DR
* His Opponent Only Technically Exists: Governor of Illinois — J.B. Pritzker
* Changing of the Guard: Illinois Secretary of State — Anna M. Valencia ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* Redistricting Roulette: US House of Representatives
* Illinois 1st Congressional District — Jacqui Collins
* Illinois 3rd Congressional District — Delia Ramirez ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* Illinois 6th Congressional District — Marie Newman ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* Illinois 7th Congressional District — Kina Collins ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* Illinois 8th Congressional District — Junaid Ahmed ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* We Vote for This Stuff?? Illinois State Central Committeepeople
* 1st District Committeeman — Lamont J. Robinson
* 2nd District Committeeman — William Davis
* 3rd District Committeewoman — Delia C. Ramirez
* 3rd District Committeeman — Omar Aquino
* 5th District Committeewoman — Nancy Sheperdson
* 5th District Committeeman — Robert Martwick
* 6th District Committeeman — Patrick Watson
* 9th District Committeeman — Michael Cabonargi
* This Was Supposed to be Interesting!: Illinois State Senate
* IL Senate District 2 — Omar Aquino
* IL Senate District 10 — Robert Martwick
* IL Senate District 12 — Javier Yañez
* IL Senate District 16 — La’Mont R. Williams
* Leftward Bound! Illinois House of Representatives
* IL House District 4 — Lilian Jimenez ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* IL House District 6 — Sonya Marie Harper
* IL House District 13 — Hoan Huynh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* IL House District 15 — Michael Patrick Rabbitt
* IL House District 16 — Kevin Olickal
* IL House District 19 — Lindsey LaPointe
* IL House District 21 — Abdelnasser Rashid
* IL House District 25 — Josef Michael Carr
* IL House District 27 — Justin Slaughter
* Chasing Waterways: Metropolitan Water Reclamation District
* Full Term — Mariyana Spyropolous, Precious Brady-Davis ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, Sharon Waller
* Unexpired Term — Chakena D. Perry
* She’s Mayor in Our Hearts: Cook County Board President — Toni Preckwinkle
* Gag Me With a Chainsaw: Cook County Sheriff — Write in Andy Taylor
* Fritz, Kari, and the Big Fucking Mess: Cook County Assessor — Fritz Kaegi
* Not Bored at All *Rimshot*: Cook County Board of Commissioners
* Cook County Commissioner, 2nd District — Dennis Deer
* Cook County Commissioner, 5th District — Jaylin D. McClinton ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* Cook County Commissioner, 8th District — Anthony Joel Quezada ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
* Cook County Commissioner, 9th District — Sam Kukadia
* Cook County Commissioner, 16th District — Leticia “Letty” Garcia
* Cook County Commissioner, 17th District — Lou Gale
* Corruption?? Where??: Cook County Board of Review
* District 1 — George A. Cardenas
* District 2 — Samantha Steele
* I Object! Judicial Vacancies
* Judge of the Appellate Court (Hall Vacancy) — Debra B. Walker
* Judge of the Appellate Court (Harris Vacancy) — Devlin Joseph Schoop
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Brennan Vacancy) — Lisa Michelle Taylor
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Callahan, Jr. Vacancy) — Tracie Porter
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Cannon Vacancy) — Diana Lopez
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Hyman Vacancy) — Read the coverage
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Ingram Vacancy) — Elizabeth “Beth” Ryan
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Leeming Vacancy) — Rena Marie Van Tine
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Lynch Vacancy) — Michael Weaver
* Judge of the Circuit Court (McGury Vacancy) — Chelsey Renece Robinson
* Judge of the Circuit Court (O’Brien Vacancy) — Dan Balanoff
* Judge of the Circuit Court (Sullivan Vacancy) — Thomas More Donnelly
* 1st Subcircuit (Johnson Vacancy) — John W. Wilson
* 4th Subcircuit (Gavin Vacancy) — Both Awful
* 4th Subcircuit (Rogers Vacancy) — Jerry Barrido
* 5th Subcircuit (Portman-Brown Vacancy) — Jenetia Marshall
* 5th Subcircuit (Shelley Vacancy) — Judie Lyn Smith
* 6th Subcircuit (Vega Vacancy) — Kerrie Maloney Laytin
* 7th Subcircuit (Martin Vacancy) — Owens “Joe” Shelby
* 8th Subcircuit (Gordon Vacancy) — Bradley Trowbridge
* 8th Subcircuit (Lipscomb Vacancy) — Stephen Swedlow
* 9th Subcircuit (Cleveland Vacancy) — Sanjay Tailor
* 9th Subcircuit (Jacobius Vacancy) — Torrick Alan Ward
* 11th Subcircuit (McGuire Vacancy) — Chris Taliaferro
* 13th Subcircuit (Groebner Vacancy) — Joe Gump
* 14th Subcircuit (Jagielski Vacancy) — Viviana Martinez
* 15th Subcircuit (Lawler Vacancy) —- Bernadette Barrett
Who Is Girl, I Guess?
Like a curmudgeonly bubbe who loudly complains that things were better in the Good Old Days because we used to have Primary Elections in March, Girl, I Guess is BACK!! Y’all, it’s been a mess. In the past year and a half since the previous full edition of Girl, I Guess, we’ve had a nationwide redistricting process that saw Illinois lose Census population (largely due to a Donald Trump-and-COVID-caused undercount) to a degree where we also lost a Congressional seat. We also had the abrupt retirement of a longtime State Senator, which necessitated a Special Edition of the Guide. We also had the massive Suburban Municipal Elections, which I largely sat out, save for having the privilege of editing a fantastic version of Girl, I Guess which was written by the folks at Evanston Fight for Black Lives. COVID also stuck around in several more waves, we’re on our fourth (fifth?) variant, and Mama is tired. Redistricting and COVID caused the Primary Election to be moved to June for the first time in Illinois, which means that I’ll have the fun task of writing four editions of the Guide over the next 12 months. This is the eighth distinct edition of Girl, I Guess, my fourth written solo, and my method is set in stone at this point. Let’s get to it, shall we?
Stephanie Skora is a grouchy Jewish trans dyke, and an anarchist with a political science degree. She is one half of the podcast TacoBagel, the COO at Brave Space Alliance, President of the Board of the Midwest Institute for Sexuality and Gender Diversity, and a founding organizer of the Trans Liberation Collective.
Girl, I Guess is Jewish, queer, trans, nerdy and dedicated to helping members of our community navigate a confusing ballot and identify the most progressive candidates. I also recommend you consult with progressive / radical organizers in your community, especially queer, trans, Black, and Brown folks because this guide is currently an individual effort, and I might be a Virgo smartypants know-it-all with a lot of opinions, but I’m far from infallible!
Putting together this voter guide is an act of love, but it is a lot of work! If you’d like to support Girl, I Guess, my PayPal link can be found here! If you don’t have PayPal, but still want to donate, you can support by donating through my Venmo account, @StephanieSkora, or my CashApp, $StephanieSkora.
As during the 2020 General, I’ll be donating 33% of the proceeds to a Black-led organization, to honor the liberation struggle that we’re all striving to be part of. Since this year’s Primary Election will be held during Pride Month (oy vey), and, as of the writing of this Guide, Chicago has already lost 7 Black trans women to transantagonistic violence, that organization will again be Brave Space Alliance.
*This guide does not represent the political views of my organizations or employer!! Brave Space Alliance and The Midwest Institute for Sexuality and Gender Diversity are both 501c3 organizations, and do not contribute to, or have anything to do with, the writing of this document, or any endorsements, opinions, or content herein!
Why Bother?
Dear reader, as the initial writing of this Guide occurs during the celebration of Pesach, and as the Primary creeps into the public conscious more and more with each passing Pritzker ad, you may be asking, “Ma nishtanah halailah hazeh mikol halei-vote?” “Why is this election different from all other elections?”
Well, I’ve got one word for you: redistricting. This time around, literally everything has changed, because we’re right in the middle of the once-a-decade process of re-drawing the maps for every single legislative body in the State, following the results of the 2020 Census. We all know how fucky the Census was, with undercounts reported across the country, and one so severe in Illinois that we actually lost a Congressional seat. But now we’ve got new maps that lean heavily Democratic thanks to a robust round of partisan gerrymandering creative cheating. Those maps have left us with a brand new 3rd District, a knock-down-drag-out Incumbent-on-Incumbent battle royale in the new 6th District, and a safer ride for 2-term incumbent and 2020 Golden Shrug-ee Lauren Underwood. Congress not sexy enough for ya? How about completely reconfigured maps for the State House and State Senate, which look to flip a handful of previously Republican-leaning seats in the West Suburbs? Still nah? The Cook County Board has new maps, too, meaning that your representative on the Cook County Board of Commissioners, an oft-overlooked but still very powerful legislative body, may have changed. STILL not sexy enough? For voters who begrudgingly engage in politics outside of the City level, we’ve got the realistic opportunity to elect four sitting Alderpeople with less-than-stellar City Council records to higher offices, clearing the way for a slew of progressive challengers in just 9 months when we hit the polls for the third time for the Municipal election. The implications for this election are going to be bigger than Lori Lightfoot’s dick.
Electoral cartography not sexy enough for you? There are plenty of other reasons to go vote. Longtime readers of the Guide will know